Would you like Paper or Plastic?
11-6-06
Jaymun has once again come back to
the HOT unit. Dave and I brought him in to the emergency room with a fever last
night. They took blood cultures from him and today we were told he has another
bacterial infection. They started him on antibiotics and gave him a platelet
transfusion. This is really scary stuff to us. When your little baby starts
shaking and his eyes are rolling back into his head and his body is just
burning up, you want to do something to stop it all. We aren't medical people.
None of this is "routine" to us. We're just a mom and a dad who love
our baby with all our hearts.
Luckily, our night nurse Evelyn was on duty. If there was
one comforting thing out of the whole experience, it was seeing her when we
came upstairs from the emergency room. She makes the hospital feel like
home, even when we're surrounded by these unfriendly sterile walls. I
can't explain how reassured I am by the sight of Jaymun's
nurses when his illness throws these frightening situations at us.
Dave and I are both worn out. There is so little time to do
anything but the very most basic things. When we sat waiting in the darkened ER
room with Jaymun, we ate out of a white lunch bag
from the cafeteria. Paper bowls, plastic silverware, etc. Dave looked at me and
said, "Isn't this romantic?" But this is what our life
has been reduced to. Stethoscopes and IV poles. Blood counts and antibiotics. Medications
and blood transfusions. Hour-long car rides and wrinkled clothes hastily
thrown into duffel bags. There is no time to think, or relax, or just be.
But we have this little baby who needs us. He needs us in a
very real way. He needs us to keep it together for his sake. We are trying our
best to make it work because there is no giving up on him. Quitting is not an
option. Jaymun hasn't stopped fighting and that's
enough reason for us to get up everyday and keep plugging away. He is a tough
little guy. A brave little boy. He smiles up at us
even when there doesn't seem to be any hope left in his day.
And for that huge grin of his, we would do anything....even
if it requires eating from a paper bag.
