Dave keeps telling me to get started on this blog, that people want to read about updates. I guess it's time to stop putting it off and just dive in. Some days I may not post at all, other entries may be lengthy. Jaymun's day is always changing and there may be times that I need to process what he's going through before I put it out there for others to read. I understand that people are genuinely interested and concerned and it touches my heart that we have so many people praying for his recovery. I may jump around a bit as I recall bits of his treatment, so bear with me. His story is not an easy one to relate, as it hits pretty close to home and some days I find it hard to believe that this is actually happening to our family.
Today was our children's first day of school. It also happened to be the morning of another procedure for Jaymun. He has to periodically get his bone marrow tested and it requires him to go without nursing for six hours or so. As many of you recall, Jaymun was over twelve pounds at birth. Therefore, this boy loves to eat. Six hours without eating, in his book, is an eternity.
We had planned for me to surprise the kids by waking them up in the morning for their first day of school. For us, the first day is a big deal. We have a tradition of serving them a candlelight breakfast in bed. I started this when Benjamin was in kindergarten-and today was his first day of High School, if that gives you an idea of how long I've been doing it! I have been taking care of Jaymun for five weeks straight, 24 hours a day, since he started chemo when he was only three weeks old. The thought of not being there for my kids to begin school was just another sad reminder that our lives have changed so drastically this summer. Maybe it sounds silly, but I really wanted to be there to see my kids off. I miss them so intensely it hurts to think about it. They have been such troopers through all of this -not one of them had complained about missing the fun first day of school "hoopla".
Dave came to the hospital to stay with Jaymun after I nursed him at 3 AM. I drove home around 4 AM to make sure I could get things ready for the morning. Can I tell you how wonderful it was to be able to wake each of them up today and see the look of surprise on their face? There is something about the anticipation of the first day of school, that feeling of newness and excitement. When I see my children sifting through their new school supplies, carefully organizing them just so and giving great thought to what outfit they'll wear first-it catapults me back to my childhood and there's no price tag you can put on that.
Jaymun's procedure was done around 9:30 AM..he has to be sedated because well, it's painful. And it's sad to say, but this isn't the first or last painful thing he has to endure. Sean and I arrived at the hospital a bit before the nurse brought Jaymun back in to the room. He was pretty groggy but not groggy enough to pass up nursing right away. (I did say the boy loves to eat, didn't I?) He fell asleep for awhile after that and when he woke up, he was smiling and laughing away.
He puts me to shame and he's only a day shy of eight weeks old. Why aren't we all more appreciative of simple joys in life everyday? Our sweet baby boy is in the hospital, hooked up to wires and IV's and his day consists of medicine, chemo, and people poking and prodding him constantly. And still he smiles. I'm thinking there's a lesson to be learned in all of this...if a little baby can undergo this kind of daily treatment and still find happiness in the faces around him, what do we really have to complain about? I realize he probably doesn't know any better, that this is his world as he knows it-but the point still remains that we have far less troubles than him and we take it for granted.
I'm going to end here for today. When time allows, I'll post more information and let people know what's going on in Jaymun's life. For now, I leave everyone who is reading about our journey this thought: What about today brought you happiness? Made you smile? Reflect on it and find joy in it-real joy. Because today, my happiness came in the form of watching four children trudging off to school, brand new backpacks flung over their shoulders-and the sweet smile of a little boy who doesn't know any better than to love life. Now, that's joy.