This morning I was cleaning out my desk, something I've been meaning to do for a while.
There were hundreds of papers - scribbled things like "8-18 - 9:00AM - 1 Burdock, 1 Green Tea"
...from Jaymun's herbal treatment last year.
Stuck in the back of a drawer were a couple of wrinkled pieces of paper
...notes jotted last fall - a morning spent in the darkened clinic room, waiting while Jaymun got fluids.
I remember that life seemed almost surreal at that point ...it had stopped and we were hanging in a weird limbo.
I was asking questions like: "What does this mean?" and "What is it all for?"
Jaymun was sleeping, blood dripping in, the lights were low, and I wrote and thought...
Answers with a "Short view"
"What does it mean that Jaymun is sick?"
...That we need to take care of him.
"What about it taking so long for his complete recovery?"
...We must be patient.
But the larger answers
are tougher to come by.
"Why did this happen to us?" "Why does God allow this sort of thing to occur?"
There is an opinion:
...That we are only collections of cells - nothing more.
That this world is merely the random result of time, space, and matter.
In that case "meaning"
is an illusion spawned by mental process and maintained by physical memory.
If we claim ownership, search for, or are satisfied with finding that "meaning" in the physical trappings of life,
then we chase, brag about, or settle for illusions. This world is quite full of pain and dissarray from this blind mentality...
However, it seems to me that the pieces of our finite universe, our environment,
our bodies were created to temporarily demonstrate and reflect truth and life of infinite value.
...neither will we find meaning by ignoring or discounting the things we see
but rather by comparing them to what we are told:
"One day our science will dissappear. Its laws will be curious relics in the infinite library of God's work."
The physical framework we inhabit will be a memory diminishing
...as it will not be leveraged, but eliminated and superceded
by a new creation.
The meaning of these experiences, the richness of life breathed into this time
will grow and be celebrated forever in the presence of
the One Who means everything
2 Corinthians 5: 1-10
"Now we know that if the earthly tent we live in is destroyed, we have a building from God, an eternal house in heaven,
not built by human hands. Meanwhile we groan, longing to be clothed with our heavenly dwelling,
because when we are clothed, we will not be found naked.
For while we are in this tent, we groan and are burdened, because we do not wish to be unclothed but to be clothed
with our heavenly dwelling, so that what is mortal may be swallowed up by life.
Now it is God who has made us for this very purpose and has given us the Spirit as a deposit,
guaranteeing what is to come. Therefore we are always confident and know that as long as we are at
home in the body we are away from the Lord.
We live by faith, not by sight. We are confident, I say, and would prefer to be away
from the body and at home with the Lord. So we make it our goal to please him, whether we are at home
in the body or away from it.
For we must all appear before the judgment seat of Christ,
that each one may receive what is due him for the things done while in the body, whether good or bad."